All's Fair in Love and War
by J.M.Maltbie
Summary: Leading up to the war Draco was Hermione's secret hero, but that changed when he chose his family over her. Now she's "won" the war but lost her love. Will they find each other again and heal their scars? Or fall apart with no one to hold them together? (I'm really bad at summaries sorry!) (Rating may go up, for now, to be safe, I'm putting T)
1. Prologue

**All's Fair in Love and War**

 **Prologue**

Hot tears rolled down the slope of her cheek, a few slipping into her mouth as she sobbed alone. It was over, they had won, yet why did she feel as if she had lost everything? Eyes squeezed shut she tried to remember the times when she had her parents, when she had him. Nothing came to mind.

The war had ravaged her memory leaving only horrors behind. The scar labeling her arm was proof. Nothing was or would be the same. Too much had been lost, taken from everyone involved. Nothing is fair in love and war because in the end, war wins and love is lost.

Light glinted in the mirror before her and she looked up to see the woman she no longer recognized. Hermione's fingers reached out to trace along the reflected edge of her face, her bush of hair braided down her back but still a mess.

A hand tried to smooth the windblown mess left over from her apparition away from the one man who would be able to comfort her right now. "Draco." She choked out his name. A desperate part of her almost thought she could summon him to her side. That they could go back to being children who protected each other. No matter what.

But instead of always, they had never. And as much as she should blame him, blame the war, blame fate, she blamed herself above it all for her loss.

"I never should have said goodbye." She hadn't realized she had spoken aloud until a voice questioned her from behind.

"Said goodbye to who, 'Mione?"

Ron's brows crinkled in confusion as he took her in. Why was she crying? They had won, everything would be alright now. Hermione rushed to wipe away the stray tears and plastered on a smile.

"No one important," her voice squeaked from clenched teeth as she forced herself to speak the lie. "No one important."

Ron shrugged and held out a hand with a grin, "Come on, the others are still returning. And you know we'd love to have you help us with fixing up new rooms for all the guests."

He laughed and she echoed it. Of course he just wants her help. That's all she is to them, a tool, Draco was always right. But she shook the bitter thoughts away. Draco was gone.

All she had was this family she had made and God help anyone who tried to take it from her.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Fog swirled around her feet, the column before her stealing Hermione's focus. Platform 9 ¾. Why was she returning? Why did she let Ginny convince her this would help? All that place did was remind her that she hadn't been enough for Draco to choose the right side.

Hermione shook her head quickly to rid it of the thought. No. She was returning because education had been and always would be her lifeline. It had never been him.

"Never Draco," she muttered, hoping that by speaking the lie it would come true.

Setting her chin high and back straight, she stalked through the column, pulling a suitcase behind her. Her trunk had already been sent ahead so she only had the clothes she had brought to the Weasley's.

The twins had been fascinated by a trunk with wheels. She had laughed at their immediate plan to make one that rolls on its own. ("With wings!" as Fred had so 'brilliantly' suggested.)

Making her way on to the train, she hurried to the back car saved for the few returning 8th years. A part of her wished Harry and Ron were with her. She craved some familiarity to settle her nerves. But they were gone, Harry to the ministry as the new poster boy Auror and Ron to the joke shop. ("Aw 'Mione, why get a ministry job when I got the twins?" had been his reasoning.)

"Are you alright Hermione? The Dabberblimps seem to be swarming you today." An airy voice drifted from the open cabin next to her. Hermione turned, a smile already forming.

"Luna," she quirked an eyebrow, "Should I be worried about Dapperblimps?"

The dreamy eyed girl waved her hand in dismissal.

"Dabberblimps. They won't hurt you, but they're attracted to indecision and heartache. Draco has them too."

Hermione choked and broke into a coughing fit at Luna's casual name drop. Looking into the cabin she found a white-blond head trying and failing to melt into the corner seat. Any other time, she would have laughed at his awkwardness. But instead she felt anger.

"Luna, you should be more careful. Surely there are other cabins open. Come on, we'll find them." Hermione practically growled and she saw Dra- Malfoy flinch. Good.

Luna cocked her head in confusion, "Why would I want to leave my friend?"

A part of Hermione died upon hearing that. She knew it was irrational, but she felt a pang of jealousy at her friend's words.

"I see." She replied testily. "Well I wouldn't want to intrude. I'll go find the others."

"There aren't any." Was the cheerful reply.

"What? It's just us?" Hermione was shocked. Surely Head Mistress McGonagall managed to recruit more than three students from their year.

Luna nodded, still smiling. "Neville's here as well, but he's helping Professor Sprout as an assistant. Everyone else needed a year for family I suppose. Well except for us…"

She trailed off, her smile flickering only for a moment. Hermione flinched at the reminder that she and Luna had no one left thanks to the war. From the corner of her eye she saw Dra- Malfoy sink lower and she knew he was thinking of their last conversation.

Immediately her brain replayed their fight.

It had been right before Christmas of their Sixth year. He had been avoiding her for a month and Harry's suspicions were starting to seem more and more possible.

Finally cornering him in the owlery one morning, she begged for the truth.

"Draco, just tell me what's going on! I can help you." She was near tears.

"No one can help me, Granger." Her bit out the sentence and she flinched at the use of her last name.

"Just please give me the truth. I know Harry can't be right." She stared into his eyes looking for the boy and best friend she knew. She found nothing.

Instead she just had confirmation. A gasp was ripped from her mouth as she realized that Harry was right. Tears began to spill down her cheek.

Draco immediately stepped forward, habit driving him to reach out and almost brush the tears away. But he froze before dropping hand.

"Hermione," he struggled to whisper her name, "I wish I could fight this war alone just to prove to you that you can be proud of me, but I am not as strong as you think I am. I have to do this. He'll…" He started to get more choked up, "He'll kill my parents if I don't. I can't let him. I can't."

She stumbled away from him. He knew her plans to wipe her parents' memories in a few months, to leave her own family behind for the greater good, to stand for what's right. She could leave her life behind, why couldn't he?

"I-I don't know you anymore." She whispered, continuing to back up towards the stairs. He went to reach for her again but thought better of it.

"Maybe you never did." It was enough to send her running down the stairs and away from him.

Hermione snapped from the memory and realized that she had somehow found her way into sitting in the cabin next to Luna, and across from him.

No matter what though, she couldn't let him ruin her chance for a fresh start. Hogwarts was the only home she had left.

Huffing, she turned to Luna. "So other than Neville assistant teaching, who else is back or new?"

She noticed from the corner of her eye that Malfoy was listening but staring intently into the corner as well. It was his go to defense mechanism: act like he didn't care while observing everything around him.

"Oh, well you remember Blaise, he's assisting the new DADA professor. And Pansy-"

Hermione cut Luna off abruptly in shock.

"The Head Mistress allowed Zabini and Parkinson back?" She hissed.

Immediately, Malfoy sat up and displayed his trademark glare and sneer.

"Watch how you speak about my friends, Granger." His tone was dangerously close to starting a fight. She glared back at him.

"And what do you know about friendship, Malfoy?" She snarled back.

His face paled and hurt flashed in his eyes but she felt no remorse. He deserved to feel the pain she'd felt for the last year.

Malfoy's emotionless mask slid back into place. He turned to look at Luna, "I'll see you at school."

With that, he stood and stalked out of the cabin.

Luna waved goodbye before launching into a story about nargles. Hermione pretended to listen all the while trying to convince herself that she wasn't jealous. She didn't miss him. She didn't need him.

Right?


	3. Chapter 2

"And the way they flit around is just beautiful!" Luna prattled on, continuing to drive Hermione mad. How long could one talk about imaginary creatures?

Sighing, Hermione struggled to find a subject change. Or at least one that didn't specifically ask about the thing her curious (not jealous) mind could not understand.

Since when was Draco friends with Luna? She didn't feel right asking plain out though. She wasn't jealous or anything after all.

"Hermione?" Luna's always lilting voice drifted to her again. "Is something the matter?"

Hermione shook her head quickly. "Nothing, Luna. Anyways, have you heard what our roles as 8th years are supposed to be yet?"

She had written to the Headmistress several times since her letter requesting her return had arrived. The only info she'd received was a broad explanation that some part time positions were required and would be fitted into the 8th years' schedules.

"I suppose we'll be expected to help teach, like Neville. I do hope I'm placed with the thestrals. Magnificent creatures, you know." Luna smiled dreamily out the window of the train.

"That does sound like you. I wonder where I'll be if that's the case." Hermione mused.

"Oh well that's easy, you'd be in History of Magic of course." Luna readily responded to the rhetorical question.

Hermione rolled that idea over in her thoughts. It _was_ her strong suit, but after everything she'd been through, living through books seemed no longer enough. Although perhaps that was because she'd grown used to having friends with her instead of creating them through the characters she read about.

Her friends. A trio of boys that never worked together but somehow all had connections to her. The savior who she saved over and over because that's what you do for a brother. The lovable dork who always managed to lighten her up. And the one who saw her fears, her dark parts, her intelligence, and treasured her for every broken part of her. But only while it was convenient for him. _I have to remember that. He left._

"Hermione? The Dabberblimps are back. Are you alright?" Luna tapped Hermione's arm gently.

Quickly shaking away the conflicting parts of her, Hermione hurried to agree. "I'll be fine. I'm just going to take a nap. Wake me when it's time to change into our robes before departing the train."

Luna continued to smile dazedly and nodded before returning to reading the quibbler.

Hermione leaned her head against the wall and closed her eyes, a sigh escaping from her and she allowed herself to relax muscle by muscle. Gradually the dark drowned her and sleep overtook her racing mind.

 _Looking around she recognized exactly where she stood. The velvet seats with dust caked on despite the constant use from children. The wooden panels on every surface the made each cabin ring with creaks and groans. The glass windows and sliding doors that could be fogged up with breath and written on with fingers. The Hogwarts Express was always recognizable._

 _She stood in the very cabin she'd first entered 8 years ago. A scared muggle-born hiding behind a know it all front, terrified that she'd be seen as lesser and therefor unworthy of friendship. She'd been alone for at least 30 minutes before an almost white haired little boy had come in as well and sat across from her. They studied each other in silence. His greased back hair. Her crooked teeth. His ice blue eyes. Her wild curls. His marble skin. Her caramel tones._

 _He had been the first to break the silence._

 _"_ _I'm Draco Malfoy. Who are you?" He spoke as one who was used to being known by others._

 _"_ _I'm Hermione Granger." She lifted her chin, pretending to be unaffected by him._

 _"_ _Granger? Father's never mentioned a Granger." His nose wrinkled back, but not out of disgust yet but just confusion._

 _"_ _That's because I'm not from your world. I've heard about your family though. Dark magic, ancient spells, it's all in the book for our History of Magic class." She narrowed her eyes at him. She had been wary of his family and the other purebloods after all their deeds she'd read about in the book._

 _He was confused as Father had always told him how lazy mudbloods were and how they never tried to educate themselves and fit in. Yet this girl had done her research and bared a scary resemblance to his mother whenever she would scold him on a subject._

 _"_ _You don't know_ me _though." He was grasping at straws to best her. Malfoys never lost._

 _"_ _You said you were Draco, right? Heir to the Malfoys. Known for being good at a broom from a young age, usually travels with two friends but I don't see them around, and you're a first year like me who will probably end up in Slytherin. Whereas I'll be in any house but Slytherin." She huffed after her speech was done._

 _He stared open mouthed at her. "That was all in a_ book _?"_

 _She snickered at him. "Goodness no, I found some magazines when I went school shopping."_

 _Suddenly, the door to the cabin was sliding open and two round little boys were standing staring at them._

 _"_ _Eh, Malfoy, aren't we heading back to the Slytherin section?"_

 _"_ _Who's this?"_

 _The two boys spoke at the same time in monotone voices. Draco had looked at her and shrugged apologetically before all emotion was gone and he was standing to join the boys._

 _"_ _Goodbye, Hermione."_

 _"_ _Hermione"_

 _"_ _Hermione"_

"Hermione!" Luna was shaking her and waving the other hand around Hermione's ears.

"Luna, whatever are you doing?" Hermione batted away Luna's hands.

"The dabberblimps were keeping you dreaming. It's time to change into our robes."


End file.
